Marriage for me

You know I have been so busy, I havent had the time to blog much. Classes, baking orders, exams, family. I tell you its so hectic. But I somehow manage to squeeze my time to blog today. I have a question for myself.

Will I ever get married?

I dont know how to answer that. I do wish someday to get married. But to live with someone my whole life? To be in bed with just one woman? Well its not like I am 'womanizer' who has bedded many women. But I dont know whether the whole being with one person is ok. But then again, being with many or constant changing is not what I want.

Do you really feel tied down after a marriage? To many asians, marriage is marrying into the family of the other, be it love-marriage or arange-marriage. That's why I dont want to get tied down like that. But thats hard. Having said that, I dont know if marrying a non-asian person would be the same or different. For me marriage is something you share everything with, the whole christian sense of "through health and sicknes, in bad and good till death do us apart" is so marvellous. Although, I as Muslim do not get the chance to say all this but I think I will still say to whomever I marry to.

The whole gender thing I am leaving it blank here. I guess I dont have a say in that. I truly believe its God's will. But definitely I know what kind of person I will get married too.

For me whether its love marriage or arrange marriage I am not sure. I wish it could be love-mariage but I dont know. No love found yet. I guess, that is again not for me to ponder or wonder. But ever since I was small reading cheesy love novels (yes I do read love novels) by Sidney Sheldon, Jeffry Archer and sorts the whole thing gets into me. I want to be in those deep deep dreamy love tales. I want to have a tale on my own. Someday where I can this love tale to my children and grandchildren. Have you ever dreamt of that kind of love? Where when you bathe, the water doesnt shi
eem to be wet enough,when you eat the water doesnt seem full enough, when you sleep you'd never be able to sleep well. This is a malay saying.

But marriage leads to alot of problems. Conflicts, disagreements and envy. Well nowadays people are more sensitive towards things. Not many are able to take things lightly and every single thing is a law, every thing leads to fights. The style of bringing up the kids will clash, be it boy or girl. The way to decorate the house will be different. The things to buy. The thing to do. I tell you after marriage things always change. Its very rare, for things to remain the same.

For me I want all kinds of marriage. Being Malay in Malaysia I must have a Malay wedding. But I also want to have a Indian style wedding. I want to have a christian style of wedding. Omit the priest only. I want a garden, beach, spring, winter, autumn,hotel style, over the top and simple wedding. I know it may be too much to ask, I know it may be too little to ask.,I also want the wedding to be done in other countries. Well I have alot of ideas. Dont let me get started. What I just mentioned was just tip of the ice berg.

Anyways, I do not know where I see myself in 10 years to come. But marriage is not on my mind now. I just want to be in a few relationships as possible, and learn from its mistakes.

Period.

(African tribe style would be exotic!)